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Will wakes up disoriented in the Amazon Rainforest in the early morning hours. He has a rough time navigating wildlife (both real and imagined) and does something he promises never to tell anyone. And then he released this podcast, of course, so it didn't work out. This is the goofy first installment of the 60-Second Travel Shorts series from Baggage Claim. Text POD to (332) 877-9540 to be our friend (or sign up here if you're outside the US and Canada).

Weird trivia and stuff Will wants to say

  • Yes, I have a TikTok. You can follow my very inactive account here.
  • Geoff - who has appeared in quite a few other episodes - was sleeping in the bed next to mine on this night. He doesn't know this story (or didn't until now). I was too embarrassed to tell him.

I hear with my little ear

  • An egg timer

Show transcript

[Theme Music Marker]

Hey everyone, Will Conway here. You may have noticed it’s not Tuesday. Or, it might be for you, but it's not for me.

I’m introducing a new project today: 60-Second Travel Shorts from Baggage Claim. Don't judge me: these were actually originally designed for TikTok. They’re super fast, low stakes stories. No sound design, recorded in one take, and they have absolutely no chronology. 

You can continue to expect the normal stories every Tuesday, and then these 60-second shorts will drop whenever I have one ready - there’s no set timeline. 

Here's the first one. Enjoy.

[Theme Music Marker]

Okay, you know that feeling when you wake up in the middle of the night paranoid and terrified? Maybe you had a bad dream or something?

Yeah okay, that happened to me.

Problem was, I was in the Amazon Rainforest. Terrible place to be paranoid.

And so I wake up in this little cabin in the jungle with a thatched roof and the wind is blowing so the thatched roof is making noise, and I decide there have to be snakes. I mean what else could it be really?

So in my head, they're just waiting for me to move and I'm laying totally still.

But I have bigger problems than invisible snakes. I snap into consciousness and realize the reason I woke up is I had to poop.

So I untuck the mosquito net and sprint out the door to avoid the sleep snakes and I run down this little bridge which connects my cabin to an outhouse.

This is on the Amazon River, so the water rises up, and everything is on stilts. We’re like ten feet above the ground.

Anyway, I get to the outhouse and it also has a thatched roof and I panic and stand at the door just like paranoid and confused.

I finally get my courage up, sit down on the toilet, and I shit you not, a frog freaks out from the toilet and through my legs.

i panic and left and about fifteen minutes later, I couldn’t hold it anymore so I pooped over the side of the bridge into the muddy river below.

[Theme Music Marker]

Alright that was the first one.

If you like it, share it.

See you on Tuesday.

Will Conway

About

Former political software guy. Now a traveler and adventurer, which isn't a job, and host of the @heybaggageclaim podcast, which really isn't either. Travel stories no one tells.